Monday, December 7, 2015
Sunday, December 6, 2015
My big little girl...
I feel like Pria turned into such a big girl over night around the time Evalette came into the picture. I took this picture of Pria this summer and she seemed so small then. Small and how her behavior was and how she talked to us was just so simple and more innocent. Not sure how to explain it. I am at a loss for words to describe it.
Having a second kid makes things tricky because of sleep and doing day to day tasks obviously. But the hardest part for me is tackling how to balance both girls attention properly. I want to teach Pria more activities/learning/school-ish stuff and get her more involved in all sorts of things. I also want her to feel respect and trust. I want her to know scriptures and stories. I want her to eat healthy and get exercise every day. I want her to feel just as important. Most of all I want to be able to figure out how to handle her tantrums that escalated majority after having Evalette. I am calm for the most part but at the end of the day or after running errands with the girls or after "one of those days" I occasionally lose it. I know Pria learn and pays attention to every detail so she sees how I react to things. It is so hard to be the perfect example for her every day. So hard. The last couple weeks I haven't felt like the best mom I could be to Pria.
In fact a couple times I have lost it and I look at Pria and she has this nervous look in her face and I instantly feel like crap. I take a deep breath and apologize to her afterwards. I need to figure out a new way to handle those situations so she doesn't see me do that as much. I plan to separate Pria and I so she can calm down in one room while I calm down in another but it doesn't always work out so perfectly haha.
I know most toddlers all do this and a lot of moms lose it too but I just am feeling bad about it right now. I don't feel like a good mom to Pria right now even though people will say I am doing just fine. Pria is a really good girl. She is very strong willed and I know it is a tough trait to have at this age but it is a good one to have later down the road. I have to keep telling myself that. I love my little free spirit so so much. Just like any good mom, I want the best for her...
Having a second kid makes things tricky because of sleep and doing day to day tasks obviously. But the hardest part for me is tackling how to balance both girls attention properly. I want to teach Pria more activities/learning/school-ish stuff and get her more involved in all sorts of things. I also want her to feel respect and trust. I want her to know scriptures and stories. I want her to eat healthy and get exercise every day. I want her to feel just as important. Most of all I want to be able to figure out how to handle her tantrums that escalated majority after having Evalette. I am calm for the most part but at the end of the day or after running errands with the girls or after "one of those days" I occasionally lose it. I know Pria learn and pays attention to every detail so she sees how I react to things. It is so hard to be the perfect example for her every day. So hard. The last couple weeks I haven't felt like the best mom I could be to Pria.
In fact a couple times I have lost it and I look at Pria and she has this nervous look in her face and I instantly feel like crap. I take a deep breath and apologize to her afterwards. I need to figure out a new way to handle those situations so she doesn't see me do that as much. I plan to separate Pria and I so she can calm down in one room while I calm down in another but it doesn't always work out so perfectly haha.
I know most toddlers all do this and a lot of moms lose it too but I just am feeling bad about it right now. I don't feel like a good mom to Pria right now even though people will say I am doing just fine. Pria is a really good girl. She is very strong willed and I know it is a tough trait to have at this age but it is a good one to have later down the road. I have to keep telling myself that. I love my little free spirit so so much. Just like any good mom, I want the best for her...
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